According to Darcy, if the answer to either of these questions is no, she doesn't think it's worth the risk.
"Relationships are hard enough to maintain when people are compatible," she points out.
We had to take a few year break before we could be friends again but now we are and it's great, I don't regret a thing. Besides seeing each other naked, we also got to know more of the good parts about each other and definitely the more unpleasant parts.
During the friendship, I wasn’t attracted to him and I kind of created a “brother/sister” type of friendship.
He was always attracted to me but just went with it while he had girlfriends.
Are you both single and of the same sexual orientation?
Are you both looking for the same kind of relationship status?
The commitment, compatibility, and trust are what tend to be more difficult to manage, especially if the one you've fallen for happens to already be a close friend. It's not impossible to transition from just friends to dating, however, Sterling recommends you do your due diligence before professing any feelings and risking the special friendship you already have.
"It's important to realize that the minute you put your feelings out there, you cross the Rubicon," she says.
We are now married 9 years and have two kids together.
It has been a wonderful journey experiencing life with someone who I feel knows, loves, and accepts all of me - imperfections and all - because after all, that's what true friends are.
To help you make your daydreams a bit more productive, she poses a few enlightening questions to ask yourself in order to figure out if the risk is worth the reward (or potential heartbreak).
First, there are the basic, logistical questions to consider.
"Make sure one of the questions you ask is, ' Have you ever had feelings for a close friend? "If the answer is yes, you can ask increasingly more pointed questions like, ' What would your advice be to someone who had feelings for a close friend?