Sometimes, it makes them uncomfortable and they choose not to engage in sexual intimacy, and that’s their choice.
It’s hard, but you have to learn that not everyone will be open enough to hearing your story, but that shouldn’t deter you from being vulnerable and having a normal sex life.
“My typical disclosure sounds something like this: ‘I have a skin condition that causes flare-ups from time-to-time.
I’ve had some partners flat-out reject me in anger, others ghost, and a couple have spilled intimate secrets in response to my vulnerability.I’ve received incredulous laughter, ignorance, hate, hugs, high-fives. In this herpes journey of mine, I’ve tripped and fallen not-so-gracefully and taken the wrong turn.Siegel, clinical sexologist and certified sexuality educator at the Modern Institutes for Sex Therapy Training and Sage Institute for Family Development, tells Bustle.“Like with any other ‘reveal,’ there might be a risk that the other person may reject you and leave.” However, he says that it’s a risk that's important to take, and that it may even help you and your partner form a closer connection and lead to better communication and intimacy.In one case in particular, that heartfelt moment and mutual respect even boosted the connection we felt toward each other.” So what does the conversation actually look like?
From what they say to how new partners react, here’s how Laureen and 22 other women tell a sexual partner they have genital herpes.
Telling a partner that you have a sexually transmitted infection (STI), such as genital herpes, may not be easy, but it’s necessary.
But, when getting to know a new partner, revealing your STI status isn’t as simple as revealing your favorite place to grab dinner.
I make sure that my body language — posture, tone of voice, eye contact — are all conveying how I feel about having herpes: There’s nothing shameful about it!
A herpes disclosure can affect how physically intimate a relationship will be, but rejection is not a systematic reaction.
Having herpes isn’t my distinguishing quality, but it is something I live with that affects my physical health.