Expecting a man to act like you and your gal pals is setting yourself up for disaster.So, here’s my dating advice – instead of being judgmental, try to be curious and “in wonder.” Think, “Let me imagine a scenario where this would be considered appropriate.” Of course, if you are wondering that too often, probably time to let this one go.This is an excerpt from Dipping Your Toe in the Dating Pool: Dive In Without Belly Flopping, part of the Adventures in Delicious Dating After 40 series. For more dating advice, read Long Distance Relationship Pros and Cons by the Dating Goddess.
It takes courage to get your cute on to meet someone for a first coffee date. In my experience of going out with 120 men in five years (this was not a life goal!
There’s always the possibility he will leave after 10 minutes explaining he’s just not attracted to you (as happened to me once). ), about half of the first dates don’t result in a second.
But if you are committed to your goal of finding a special sweetie, you can’t give up.
And you’ll be amazed at how having an adventuresome spirit is alluring to many men!
First dates don’t often end with you both enamored with the other. If he wasn’t a jerk, odious, or has other deal breakers, agree to another encounter if he asks.
But make sure it’s reasonably short – a walk, museum visit, lunch or dinner.
” The definition of attractiveness varies with the person. Tell the personal shopper you want some date clothes — and wear them! You’ll have your wits about you more than if you are agog over someone. You don’t want to waste either of your time, but you may meet a nice guy.
Some men find a dazzling smile trumps a few extra pounds. Sometimes it takes others to see assets we mistakenly call liabilities. You can avoid many dud dates by talking to a potential suitor a few times on the phone before agreeing to even coffee.
Loneliness causes us to misinterpret politeness for attraction.
Keep your heart in check until enough time has passed that he’s shown his caring for you multiple times.
Just like a treasure hunt, you never know when or where you’ll uncover a prized gem. ), but know you are learning a lot about yourself, men, and what you want along the way.